Everybody knows that Craigslist is the best place in the world to find random, possibly diseased sex partners and crappy furniture nobody wants.

Naturally, then, a Philadelphia woman who says she wants to find a special female to deflower her “extremely smart but socially awkward” 18-year-old son knew exactly where to turn: the “casual encounters” section of Philly’s Craigslist personals.

The young man is allegedly going to Harvard, you see, and his mother says she wants him to be sexually ready when he arrives in Cambridge. Because what kind of mother wouldn’t be worried sick about that?

“This is going to sound strange but my son is a senior in High School and I want to help him,” the concerned mother writes in the ad placed on July 16 12:49 p.m. Eastern time. The ad is titled “Sugar Baby for my Son – m4w – 18 (Philly).”

It’s not clear what this kid is doing still in high school in the middle of July.

He “has never had a girl friend,” she explains. She is “sure he’s a virgin.” He is — or was — also a member of the varsity cross country team at an undisclosed high school. He is “very handsome and extremely fit… There’s almost zero body fat on him.”

The helpful mother says she wants “to find a cute young girl to date him and turn him from high school nerd to cool college kid.”

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